It's been nine months since my grandfather went into the nursing home, and I think I'm finally starting to come to terms with the fact that he's going to be staying there permanently. I'm pretty much just taking it one day at a time and trying to visit him as often as I can, partially because he's still with it enough that he called me out on it.
But now more shit's rolling downhill towards my family.
My grandmother (Dad's mom) has been having problems with confusion lately, and we thought she was having mini-strokes or something. She ended up going to the emergency room last week and was diagnosed with a UTI; apparently those can cause confusion in elderly patients. CAT scan showed no evidence of a stroke of any kind, she was sent home with antibiotics, everything's fine.
Yeah, not so much. Early Sunday morning Grandma thought she had a stroke or something and ended up falling in her bedroom and hitting her head on her bedroom door, hard enough that the doorknob went through the adjacent wall. For some reason I'm not clear on she waited a few hours to call one of my aunts who thankfully summoned the ambulance and Grandma was taken to the hospital. Again they did a CAT scan and again there was no evidence of a stroke, but they did find an epidural hematoma, probably from when she hit her head on the door. By Sunday night it had gotten bad enough that she was having trouble swallowing, and it's just gotten worse from there. An MRI was done today and according to that she did suffer a stroke at the base of her brain. From what Dad's told me and what I've heard him tell Mom Grandma's still confused, her speech is really slurred, she's black and blue and the doctor's not very optimistic that she's going to get much better. In fact, tonight when I came home from work and I asked how Grandma was doing Dad said she wasn't doing too well. And Mom mentioned something about how most of the family would probably prefer having our pastor handle the funeral instead of the pastor of the church one of my other aunts goes to. So to me it goes without saying what her chances are at this point.
And this whole time all I can think is that I can't go through this again, not with another grandma. Seven years ago in the fall we were playing a similar waiting game, with my grandma on my mom's side. Grandma is a healthy, active, vibrant woman; she's painted and sketched all of her life, and the last time I was at her house she had a painting she was working on. It wasn't supposed to happen like this, damnit!